Today is Sunday and that’s already a good excuse to stay home. Time to rest and to do things in the house that needed to be done. Today was Formula Indy day in my city. It’s raining intensely and the race was rescheduled for tomorrow. This rain makes the idea of leaving my bed almost impossible. This rain makes my eyes wanna close for a nap all the time. It’s such a great sensation. There’s nothing to be done. I made some coffee and now i’m typing while looking through the window. It’s raining with no thunders. Nothing to put us on edge. I may say my house feels as a womb and i can understand why babies don’t want to leave this safe and warm place. I’ll probably start to watch a movie and i’ll try not to remember that tomorrow is Monday. And it will be a rainy monday so instead of the tranquility of my home i’ll get a rainy day’s traffic jam. Another week full of things to resolve and people to please. What looks so amazing today will probably ruin my day tomorrow. I’ll be outside the womb and inside the messy rainy world fighting hard to live another rainy sunday in my house and in my bed.
After 72 hours without almost no speed due to many things happening together i just laid in my bed after a great shower and started reading my posts. I’m not sleepy yet because of the adrenaline probably engaged by stress so now i again will start a process to cool down. That can be really healthy and it makes me wonder how common it is to be like that now a days. We life in rushes of stress separated by a couple healing days. It’s always like that. When you are in the middle of something really important it seams you forget about the planet and the bills and the meal and so on. You even forget to go to the bathroom sometimes. It’s amazing how strong our bodies are and that’s why we stop feeling the need for these thing but we gotta know we need to stop. The funny thing is that when we do stop it seams our body tries to collect our dues to it. When i’m in the middle of action i can get rain and cold weather and stay with no food and nothing wrong happens but when it end and i get to rest i get sick. Sometimes a cold or things like that. The most amazing is that the mind suffers in the same way. I can deal calmly and attempt in big stress situations but when it ends and i get home i get depressed. It’s very hard to wake up in the next day. A lot of people on filmmaking complain about this. It’s the lack of routine and this ups and downs that simulate a kind of bipolar behavior that reflects in out actual state of mind. Funny how the body works. It’s so perfect we usually overuse it.
You know what i mean. You wake up clueless and start a regular day. It’s impossible to predict that a couple hours later everything you believe was right will collapse under your feet and you will fall no matter what. I think most of you probably had already one day like this or many. Today it was this day for me. Funny thing when we are on the edge of trouble our personality flourishes best. I can say i was able to hold on in there until everything was saved. The interesting thing is how close it is to a thunder storm. You feel it will be the end of the world but in stops eventually and when it ends it doesn’t take long to feel like it happened decades ago. There’s always something good to learn from days like these. Today i learned that people lie. It doesn’t matter how good they are. They lie. It’s just what they do. I also learned that people don’t measure consequences specially when these consequences will not be happening to them but to someone else. The important thing is that the day ended and everything that looked helpless before was fixed somehow. If things were easy we would not fight for them, right? So now the only thing that can fix one of those days. A great shower and my bed. My safe place in this world.
The eternal solitude of the restless Mind 