Archives for posts with tag: relation

Passion is almost oposite to the love of old couples. Passion is very strong but it fades soon. Love is much more mild but it can last forever. The sex in Marriage has much more to do with passion in the beginning but after that something must replace passion. Most say there’s no marriage without sex but how do they do after decades together? I’m with my wife for five years now. As the relation is still kinda new it didn’t happen yet but surely someday passion will fade away and from what i read in magazines everybody is still having sex after passion fades. Is it a lie? What do they do to not become more like brothers and sisters to their  wives and husbands? Or do they become brothers and sisters and eventually sex is not an option anymore? If this is the case why does everybody lies about this? Are we obligated to have sex to be happy and functional and accepted? How long does sexual interest remains in a relationship? What i can say for my five years is that sex is not the most important thing anymore. The person i’m with is much more than that. Only to be able to participate in her life would be enough. I can’t think of myself anymore without her. So what’s the role of sex in this relation? What is the trick?

It’s interesting how the ritual of going to the pub and having a couple beers with friends is universal. Everyone in any city can identify with that. It’s that time where you can say things to other adults that you can’t in the work environment and you are distant enough from your home to feel careless at least for a couple hours. I’m not saying that i feel uncomfortable at home or that i prefer the pub but i guess it’s a kind of safe spot. It’s really the only place where men can gossip and women can drink as equals with no judgement. It’s where we can release the stress from that day’s work. Some can get carried away and will probably leave at last with too many drinks on it’s blood. Some will show up only to not be forgotten because you can strength your relations much better when there’s beer around. Your drinking pal is always one step closer to help you and to understand you in a problem or difficult situation. It’s like a special society. That’s why you gotta take care with the people you go out with. Many secrets are shared and some with regret afterwords. Some situations are created and can’t be dissolved. We can learn about character and we understand our colleagues much easier. “In Vino Veritas”.

It still amazes me how do we interact with other humans. How we have the same reactions we had when we
where children. Couples are one of the most interesting of these relations. I always had girls as friends. Some guys never believed my friendship with girls could be real and for them i was always looking for them with second intention. I guess my only second intention as a 20’s guy was the fact that they were invited to every great party and they helped me getting in many of those. I will not lie that i felt attracted to a couple of them because i had some really pretty girls as friends but i prefered to keep the friendship. i’m a curious person by nature and i always enjoyed to listen to their side of the story. I have to say they were really helpful and i was an educated guy when women was the subject. That didn’t help me getting into a couple messes though. So by this i can say i heard plenty from both sides and in my point of view nobody is a victim. I heard for a long time girls complaining that there were no single men anymore and a listened to that statement while messages would arrive in their phones asking them to go out in dates at fancy restaurants. They would say these guys were looking only for sex but i would listen to them complaining next week that the guy wouldn’t stop calling and that he was worst than gum to get rid of. The fact is that those girls were looking for a mister nice (nice reads good looking in this case) guy so they could have a lot of fun with them and get dumped (dumped means free in this case) on the next morning. So when the guy started to call like crazy because he could really get interested these girls would freak out. I’m talking about the beginning of the 90’s. Seams to me that things are a little more honest these days. Some girls just tell what they are looking for and guys do the same. Now let’s not forget about us guys so let’s imagine we were that nice looking guy that went out with my friend. In this case we as men were privileged by society and the only part we would have to play in that dinner would be the nice guy. We would lie about our intentions but that’s not actually lying, it’s being romantic. You see the feminin touch. Romance. That’s the perfect hint and excuse the feminin minds gave guys to split after sex. The problem with that is guys don’t act with a plan just like women do so you girls just teach us that we will spend our hole lives leaving next morning. Thanks god and mothers probably but guys can’t live alone for long and i bet you girls know it. So no matter how used a guy is to do the next morning routine he will always be ready to be summoned when he is needed. It would be even easier if we guys were not so afraid of changes. That’s the reason we sometimes take a while to engage. In the end what i learned is that everyone can get involved when they feel like it. The problem with always choosing the “wrong” person is that it is always the perfect choice at the moment. We are looking for a wrong person because we don’t want to go further. Because we want that excuse in the next morning. The only unlucky in this “perfect” system are those who don’t understand these facts and are not clever enough to walk away next morning.
PS: Don’t for a moment think i don’t believe in love but that’s not the subject here.