Archives for posts with tag: passion

Passion is almost oposite to the love of old couples. Passion is very strong but it fades soon. Love is much more mild but it can last forever. The sex in Marriage has much more to do with passion in the beginning but after that something must replace passion. Most say there’s no marriage without sex but how do they do after decades together? I’m with my wife for five years now. As the relation is still kinda new it didn’t happen yet but surely someday passion will fade away and from what i read in magazines everybody is still having sex after passion fades. Is it a lie? What do they do to not become more like brothers and sisters to their  wives and husbands? Or do they become brothers and sisters and eventually sex is not an option anymore? If this is the case why does everybody lies about this? Are we obligated to have sex to be happy and functional and accepted? How long does sexual interest remains in a relationship? What i can say for my five years is that sex is not the most important thing anymore. The person i’m with is much more than that. Only to be able to participate in her life would be enough. I can’t think of myself anymore without her. So what’s the role of sex in this relation? What is the trick?

Are you free? Ever was? How much freedom is enough? I know it sounds like an easy one and the more freedom you have the better but i’m inclined to disagree on that. I met i guy sometime ago that made me think about it. He was a representative for the homeless in the government and he was a homeless his hole life. Not actually a homeless because homeless people usually are living in the city on the streets. He walked. Thousands of miles by foot. He was not a pilgrim also because he didn’t believe in god and wasn’t going nowhere specific. He was a walker. Not more than that. His passion was taking the road going nowhere with no attachments at all.When i met him he was living in a house for four years and it was driving him crazy. He met a woman and found loved and had a child. After i while he decided the road was too dangerous for them and became a homeless in my city. He is a very intelligent guy so after a while he started defending his class. His party decided he should have a house and he accepted as being a place for his family. Beautiful ending? Not a all. Not even an ending. The was feeling imprisoned inside a house and he was getting prepared to leave his family. For him the house was a lot and he would leave for the wife and child. He paid his dues and it was time to go back to the road. I really tried to understand what was his passion about it and what i learned is that he couldn’t compromise with anything. His heaven is the road with no beginning and no end. People would always give him food on his way and he was used to sleep under the stars. Somehow his story made me sad because of his wife and kid. Not because of him. He told me many cruel things that happened with him on the road and all i could see is that it was his choice. When he had different he just was not interested. He is the person with more freedom that i ever met. Freedom from society, family, money, politics, food, shelter, clothing, you name it. What i understood from him is that love requires commitment. Sharing requires commitment. Family requires commitment. Those are all prisons in that guy’s opinion. His house is a prison. Yet i don’t envy his choices and i can say he is not courageous. He is a coward. Balance in important in everything. Even in Freedom. We do need limits. We do need rules. Many researches proves that kids with no limits are not happier. On the contrary. Of course i’m not talking about being locked down or anything like that but freedom have it’s price and it’s limits. It’s important for us to understand how much is healthy and needed and when it is too much.

Why the same things that make our lives great are the ones that can make it miserable? Family, love, kids, music, poetry, alcohol, drugs, job, money, therapy, power, chocolate, burgers and many others. Sometimes we look our selves in the mirror and we like what we see but in just a moment it can all turn around and we can realize it’s all wrong. The nurturing of our minds is a matter of survival. It may sound stupid but they can turn against us and ruin everything. The great daddy can become a boring old looser, love can be questioned, your children can turn against you, poetry can sound depressing and so on. You can be positive or negative about almost anything and any subject. A friend of mine told me today the first moment she had a panic attack in her life. She was at her house just wondering about stuff when she decided to look herself at the mirror. She realized she was older but she did look great. Everything in place and still hot. Her eyes were really beautifully colored like an emerald. Somewhere in her mind she realized her mind was trapped in the back of her eyes. She could not see but through her own eyes. That’s all she needed at that moment. It took six years of Lexapro and Xanax to put her back on track. So i think that at the same time you need many things to make you feel good you need only your mind. It’s like we focus our happiness on stuff just as we believe a rabbit’s foot can give us luck. The reality though is that we don’t need anything because we produce our passions inside our guts and there’s nothing that can persuade us agains’t it if we decide it so. So is true that the best things in life are for free. You can have all the stuff that you want and be miserable about it or maybe lucky and happy about it. You can be a godess and feel horrible or great. You can have nothing and feel free or stuck. Those are tricks from our minds to remember us the really important things. To show us if the decisions are right or wrong. To define us. And there’s no material possession that can fill this hole. You can keep buying and receiving and wining and gaining but you will not find your answer there. Your answer is inside you. It is you.