Archives for posts with tag: deception

People say the best part of having parties is preparing them. For me the only true i learned about them is that there’s much more disappointed than expected. Parties are usually much more fun to guests than to the owner who is trying to make the best experience to everybody and taking care of everything that is going on. If you do everything right still some people never make it and that is uncomfortable. I guess the big issue with parties is the anticipation and as the philosopher here use to say: Anticipation is the mother of deception. Probably parties are made for kids and when we are kids they work out great. Firstly because we don’t worry about most of the work and also out moms make sure people will show up. We just have to open the gifts and the disappointment stays in the level of what we asked for and what we got. When we are older many other things as fear of failure and rejection populate our nightmares. Please guys don’t think i was a sad little kid with no friends. I was actually very lucky and also very logical. I would invite at least double the people needed to fill the place. That way there was always people at my parties but i worked really hard to entertain so the fun would be the food leftovers that would be the next days meals. That of course because you can’t barely eat when you are hosting. Another usual problem is that people makes really funny things in parties and some get wild and the host gotta take care of the wild and the drunk and the weird. I hope some of you have different experiences with parties and i really love the concept but as i grew older i stopped making them. As a matter of fact these days i’m even too lazy to go to parties…

I heard many times before that i should live the present. I’m not sure the real reason people say that but i do have some ideas on this matter. Firstly the obvious idea: we live the present. We don’t live the past or the future instead we use past and future to project our selves. Projecting for the future helps creating it. More traditional people believe it to be called planning and strategy. More advanced ideas as the teories from quantum physicists support that you really create your future in your mind. The physical result is actually controlled by your mind’s projection of it. So you can project for the future as a benefit. But what about the past? This one should be easier to figure out because it is already there. It’s all written. Even so it can be more deceptive than the mysterious future. If you live your present according to your future you will be creating. If you live your present according to your past you will be stuck in it. The past is nothing more than a giant series of information coming from everywhere including our own journeys. When you look at it you start to use your memory. So far so good. It’s important to learn but we learn from mistakes and many times mistakes hurts us. So this information is not for free. It comes with a lot of things we don’t want or need to access. That’s where we create our defenses. That’s where we learn to fear. The big question is: How to get this information without the pain? People gotta be brave and take it? Even so the result is not that great. You learn to be afraid of heights but the feeling that comes with it can be as dangerous as heights depending on the situation. I’m using a simplistic example here. Think about other things we learn. We develop Karmas. We keep doing the same mistakes. That way we are repeating a projection for the past. The fat guy repeats his eating everyday. The dumb girl keeps choosing the wrong guys. We do to our kids the same things our parents did to us. The most creative we can be is to do the opposite. But getting free from this legacy and trying something new is something very uncommon. I think that’s nothing we can do about it. But i also think if we have this in mind we can do much more by trying. And the best way to try it is to focus on the present. Because life is in the present. The future is a possibility and the past is a big trap. I believe the present is a shadow of our souls. The past and the future are shadows of our present. Present= Life.

We can’t live without it. It’s amazing how far we usually travel from the easier path in doing things and making choices. Maybe it has something to do with boundaries. We are always trying to extend our limits since we were babies and after a hole life doing this same procedures it becomes part of our personality. The result is Drama which is an interpretation from the old greek theatre meaning action. In this case it means action with no origin. It means to do things without necessary reasons or consequences. What is the relation between drama and limits? That’s just an opinion of mine but what i believe is that we have this mechanism activated to create tension and it was born with the need to break boundaries. To defy the Word “NO”. Kids fall from the stair of their homes because parents told them not to climb it. They upset Parents by not eating or not wanting to bath because they are constantly testing. We learn that we need to generate tension to get further and sometimes when there’s a lack of tension we create it from nothing. The solution usually is in front of our eyes but we need to try other paths and believe in other ways far form the right one. The problem with this is the deception it creates over and over enough for some people to also include this pattern into their own personalities as well. The big charade takes them nowhere and deep down they know it but the need for drama prevail and keeps this deception roulette moving. Some people can make it so real they feel much more pain from what they can generate in their minds than what the world really causes in their lives. Again it’s a matter of choice and anyone can decide to stop it and try to be more racional about things. It’s also a matter of balance. A little drama is heathy even to keep our passions alive. The problem is when it gets out of control and someone spends more than it should living in this private purgatory. The problem is when this drama becomes part of our relations and as it happens in our minds we can have a vicious circle going on and ending up defining these relation that after a while will not exist without deception. In other words: Stop sharing your drama and start sharing your easy.